


Sorry about the blood in your mouth. I wish it was mine.

by RunIntoTheNight



Category: Tokyo Ghoul
Genre: Aftermath, Bad Pick-Up Lines, Don't Examine This Too Closely, F/M, Inspired by Richard Siken, M/M, Married Couple, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Out of Character, Past Relationship(s), Past Violence, People Change People, Sad with a Happy Ending, Saiko and Hide are the best friends we deserve, Tags Are Hard, This Is STUPID, Unrequited Love, Urie Kuki is Bad At Feelings, probably
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-10-26
Updated: 2017-10-26
Packaged: 2019-01-23 17:33:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 3
Words: 2,132
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12512584
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RunIntoTheNight/pseuds/RunIntoTheNight
Summary: The glass in Hide's eyes is impenetrable, reflecting the lights of a shattered Tokyo like a twisted mirror. He smiles despite himself, but it's a tight lipped, tired smile that feels more sour than happy, really.The strings of your heart pull tightly, hold it in a vice-like grip, and you finds yourself silently wondering what had brought him to this point.





	1. a stone on the path.

**Author's Note:**

> i just ,,, Needed to write uriehide

 

 

> _"5_
> 
> _It wasn’t until we were well past the middle of it_  
>  _that we realized_  
>  _the old dull pain, whose stitched wrists and clammy fingers,_  
>  _far from being subverted,_  
>  _had only slipped underneath us, freshly scrubbed._  
>  _Mirrors and shop windows returned our faces to us,_  
>  _replete with the tight lips and the eyes that remained eyes_  
>  _and not the doorways we had hoped for._  
>  _His wounds healed, the skin a bit thicker than before,_  
>  _scars like train tracks on his arms and on his body underneath his shirt."_
> 
> _\- Richard Siken, Crush_
> 
>  
> 
> * * *
> 
>  

**It's midnight when he confesses without saying a word.**

 

The colored lights blink sporadically, flashing over his scarred skin, casting shadows where darkness would happily reside for the sake of hiding shameful disfigurement.

Web-like patterns outstretched over his jaw to his cheek, some scars more pronounced  than others sticking out like sore thumbs.  _He did a number on him,_ you remember thinking weeks back when someone else's business became your own. Since then, much has changed but he remains consistently shaken. There's something sickly about him, from the wobbly smile that he forces far too often to the way his brows scrunch in confusion when someone offers to help  _him._ Now, as you stare right through him, you think you can see glass aching to break up in shards over freckled cheeks.

Hide points to the moon but you look at his hand, watch as his fingers shake. His face contorts because he sees someone in the moon and the stars, ~~someone who sees someone else while looking at the same view,~~ and for a moment you can understand each other. The glass breaks. It's short-lived.

 

 

 

 

> **Nagachika's hands encompass Kaneki, too protecting and too tight to hide absolutely anything.** The world is silent as he hangs onto him like a life force, bloodshot eyes dripping with salty tears that said everything his actions could not. Loud sobs fill heavy air, a vice like grip almost scratching into pale shoulder blades, never wanting to let go. Confusion is a clear scene on everyone's face, but all can see this has been a long time coming for one half.
> 
> You and Saiko watch, enamored with the situation. It's too bittersweet for anyone to be genuinely happy. 
> 
> Kaneki breaks into sobs, apologies and other word vomit. You wish you could feel more for him when he seems so pained; at this very moment, with the kill count on his name reaching the uncountable, you can't help but wonder how Sasaki would handle a situation like this. Surely, he wouldn't be able to live with himself. Surely, it would be so much more different if he were here.
> 
> It serves well to remind you that  _Sasaki is dead_ and that issue is of no worry now. Instead, the worry comes through Saiko's torn up face. She's shivering with the realization that this man, although with the same body, is not her father figure. She's shaking because all the hope has left her body and there's a numbness threatening to succumb her completely. 
> 
> "Maman is gone." Saiko mutters distantly, a shudder following her words like a ghostly figure. There's no thought to your actions as you inhale deeply and pull her face into your chest, letting her bleed tears into your already ruined shirt. _This is a one time occasion,_ you tell yourself,  _someone has to be the strong one here,_ and even with the salt that stung your own eyes you seemed to be the most qualified person there. "U-Urie, he's gone."
> 
> There's emptiness where your breath used to take up space.
> 
> **"I know."**

 


	2. Chapter 2

 

 

 

 

>  
> 
>  
> 
>  
> 
> _**"I arrived in the city and you met me at the station,** _
> 
> _**smiling in a way** _
> 
> _**that made me frightened. Down the alley, around the arcade,** _
> 
> _**up the stairs of the building** _
> 
> _**to the little room with the broken faucets, your drawings, all your things,** _
> 
> _**I looked out the window and said** _
> 
> _**This doesn’t look that much different from home,** _
> 
> _**because it didn’t,** _
> 
> _**but then I noticed the black sky and all those lights.** _
> 
> _**We walked through the house to the elevated train.** _
> 
> _**All these buildings, all that glass and the shiny beautiful** _
> 
> _**mechanical wind.** _
> 
> _**We were inside the train car when I started to cry. You were crying too,** _
> 
> _**smiling and crying in a way that made me** _
> 
> _**even more hysterical. You said I could have anything I wanted, but I** _
> 
> _**just couldn’t say it out loud."** _
> 
>  
> 
>  

It's a week in when Saiko tells Urie Hide used to be talkative.

 

The first question on his mind is how she got this information. 

Dark eyes switch between the small girl and the space where a tuft of orange hair would usually reside, train of thought having trouble connecting the dots. He cannot imagine the man's voice. All he has ever had the opportunity to hear from him were faint clicks of tongue, used as some sort of code for lack of any other options. It's an odd thought to even imagine now, though it shouldn't be.

 

The tiny woman decides to explain herself, standing by with her arms crossed over her chest, sensing unvoiced questions from the other. "He told me himself." She says, as if it's obvious - and really, it is. It should be, anyway. Despite that, she looks proud.

Urie blinks, brows knitted closely together. There's a short pause, silence, as if he's considering asking  _more_. Though he forces the cat down, not wanting to be killed by unhinged curiosity tonight. "You two together is a bad idea." Is all the squad leader adds, pointedly trying to leave it at that. Something embedded in his natural instincts told him that he'd be better off drinking mints with a carbonated soft drink than mixing Yonebayashi with Nagachika. His feet start moving onward at the thought, trying to not so skillfully avoid this topic. 

_"Waaait~!"_ Yonebayashi yells as she watches Urie turn his back to the whole thing, legs moving to catch up to a speeding leader, obviously not ready to let this go as much as he was hoping to. "Don't you want to know what we talked about?"

The question rings in Kuki's head as well - does he? He genuinely finds himself wondering if he does.

He thinks about that night on the rooftop, when he caught a glimpse of a scarred face and watery eyes, completely vulnerable and void while a dull fire that burned in the city reflected over brown irises; remembers a forced toothy smile and words left unsaid - unable to be said.

It's a second of weakness that the blue haired girl catches up to as quickly as it comes and goes.

Saiko grips Urie's wrist. Hangs on, if only for a second. "He told me about that talk you two had."

The sentence hangs in the air, tension piercing for only a bat of an eye, before Urie turns his gaze elsewhere and continues to walk onward.

"He really _does_ talk too much."


	3. Chapter 3

 

 

Saiko's been silent for awhile now.

 

Her legs swung up and down, a perplexed facial expression painting her features whilst a hum emitted her throat. The motion looped, ongoing and seemingly endless. The office seemed almost empty except for the repetitive sound that echoed, over and _over_. Urie sighs, blinking for a good second before twisting to look her in the eyes.

 _"What?"_ He asks simply, head tilted and brows quirked upwards. Saiko's reaction is almost immediate, ~~as if she were waiting~~ for the acknowledgement about her obvious issue. Scratch that, she probably was.

"I'm glad you asked." The blue haired woman says, shoulders slumped and stance too serious for the person it was coming from. "How do you know if someone **likes** you?" The question is simple but it still takes the other off guard. He must've had a quizzical expression written allover because she's quick to add, "I mean, like-like. Like the **I'd be willing to watch an Adam Sandler movie with you just to spend time with you' type of like. Like,** -"

"I get it, I get it." Urie stops her midway, seeing the gears only start to turn in the smaller girl's head. He pauses, brows scrunched in the perplexity of two thoughts. _One_ , who was the unlucky bastard Yonebayashi was infatuated with(?), and two, how **_do_** you know if someone likes you? The silence is bleak for the moment in lasts, Urie and Saiko staring blankly at each other with their brows furrowed in a line. Urie is the one that ends up breaking the silence. "You've got the wrong guy."

"You made _that_ pretty obvious." A huff is all she adds to that, shoulders slagging and disappointment showing. "Saiko's gonna go ask Hide!" The girl proclaims with forced determination, taking the stance of a cheesy superhero with her fists to her side. Urie only quirks a brow in response, peeked interest showing through by the smallest twinge, only for him to force that down as well. (Un)luckily, Saiko takes notice, lips quirking upwards smugly before she starts to move away and take her leave.

 

"Should Saiko say you said hi?" The girl asks as if she were going to take his answer into consideration. Urie blinks.

 

"I didn't say hi." She's almost on the other side of the door when she hears it.

 

_"Saiko will say you said hi!"_

 

* * *

 

 

There's a mop of dyed twinged orange hair sticking out in a fairly empty office. It's Hide. He seems to be eating something, chopsticks in hand and fingers moving fairly quickly, resembling a starved orphan and not a mildly hungry adult. The messiness of it all only increases when Saiko jumps out, open palms on her head and a loud **"BOO!"** emitting her lips. Hide falls over. Saiko has a ramen noodle dangling over her face.

 

It's only when they clean up and throw away soaked papers (that they're _hoping_ aren't important) that Saiko bounces on her toes to hug her friend excitedly. He's quick to return the favor, ruffling her slightly sticky hair and smiling in an exasperated manner. It's only when they part that the girl gets a serious look to her, pout forming to boot. "Saiko came here to talk!"

"Then talk!" The boy perks, smile wide and ready to listen to his friend. "I'm all ears." Saiko plops herself on Hide's desk.

"I like Hsiao." His brows raise at the sudden confession. That was...blunt. His mind provides him with several questions and the number just keeps rising.

"Ching Li?" Saiko nods once, as if it were just _that_ obvious. "Oh."

"How do I know if she likes me back?" The smaller of the two questions in a whiny tune, blinking multiple times while staring at her hands. "And _why_ is this so difficult?"

Hide finds himself boarding a train of thought he's been avoiding for a long time. He's been good at recognizing other's emotions his whole life, bad at controlling his own for as long as he can remember though. How _do_ you really know if someone likes you back? The question may be a yes or no answer but it's still not simple. And yet his friend requires one. The boy forces a smile that doesn't even try to reach his gaze. "I say...Just keep an eye out for the little things."

"Little things?"

"Yeah, like..." The blonde scratches his cheek nervously. "Like how she treats everyone else compared to you. Or how she looks at you. You know, that type of thing!" He's very aware of how much he sounds like a teen magazine questionnaire, but that doesn't seem to stop the other from nodding and grabbing a pen off the table to write it all down (on her hand). She drops it halfway through her second sentence. The girl's mood seems to fall as drastically as her face.

"And...and what if Saiko sees nothing special?" A genuinely sad smile casts itself onto Nagachika, mirroring the sadness of Yonebayashi's frown.

"Then you'll have to let it go and move on." Hide finds himself thinking he should take his own advice. It takes him a moment to snap out of it, finger back to scratching the side of his face anxiously. "B-But that's only if it turns out that way! You don't know anything yet, stay positive!"

Saiko's defeated expression seems slightly lifted again, a soft nod following closely after. "Alright! Saiko shall try her best!" The girl says, standing once more and punching an inked fist in the air. She's ready to take her leave once more, glee radiating off of her despite the nerves that etched themselves into her mind.

 

And then she reminds herself, as if it's an after thought. " _Oh_ , and Hide?"

 

"Hm?"

 

"Urie says hi."

 

Hide scratches his cheek once more.


End file.
